Legalize Weed

[poolhall_junkie]

ok so follow me on this because i think this really could work. someone needs to contact their representative (obviously a conservative so if you live in illinois or washington dont bother goin to your house rep). purpose that they start a bill for a provisionary trial on weed for 6 months to a year we'll say it's to test the ability of americans to handle the substance in a controlled and responsible manner. this is the first part and the good thing about it is it gets the stoners to stop whining about how weed needs to be legal cause honestly i'm so sick of hearing that stuff. oh and we also need to put in something about how any other narcotics legalization will require 5/6th house vote in order to give a provisionary period. this does 2 things it throws the suspicion off by making it look as though were just tryin to keep other drugs from being legalized and it actually does keep other drugs from being legalized as well. the next part is we add a whole metric **** ton of dog ears and pork barrel crap that libs will allow just to get the provisionary period. and very low and discretely we add on in as few words as possible slip in something along the lines of "return all illegal or undocumented persons to place of origin". anyway thats my plan to kick out the illegals and to get pot heads to shut up. got anything better?

[Spirit of Ronald Reagan]

With any luck, the pot heads will be too stoned and forget to vote next election. Why stop at just slipping the illegals in? Add a provision that all liberal Congresspeople must be draped in the soviet flag & have hitler mustaches painted on them, limit the amount of time nancy pelosi can blink per minute, all libs must hold in their farts as to not increase global warming (hopefully this will cause them to spontaneously combust like in South Park) and while giving speeches obama can only speak in pig latin while keeping his teleprompter in English.

[poolhall_junkie]

sir with all do respect i have to say your ideas are ludicrous
"have hitler mustaches painted on them" paint washes off tattoos dont
"limit the amount of time nancy pelosi can blink per minute" when she blinks ignorance doesnt poor out. it only poors out of her mouth.
"all libs must hold in their farts as to not increase global warming" they must hold their farts but not their ideas?
"while giving speeches obama can only speak in pig latin while keeping his teleprompter in English" i'm gonna go with he has to give all his speeches by spelling everything out with his finger and never saying a word

[Aaron Burr]

Oh wow man. A total discussion about legalizing da' kine...oh, um, "bro".

I was totally trippin' yesterday and like I saw President Reagan or something. He was all giant and floating around the room.. I was all like "Yo! Dutch, what's the schnizzle on the Weed my man?" And he's all thoughtful looking for a minute and the he says, "The only legitimate way to generate revenue is through the strengths of our people, not their weaknesses."

It turns out that if you legitimize their weaknesses, you corrupt the body politic. Better to inculcate a natural revulsion towards artificial stimulants in the populace than legitimizing them. Look at Nevada. The whole state is kinda' skeevy because of the gambling...and the whores. Now look at Texas. Say what you will, that state is solvent, industrialized, and growing.

However, I'm always up for compromising so lets kick it down to the state level and mercilessly gut whatever federal agency is trying to run interdiction instead of the Coast Guard and Border Patrol. Or we could even kick it down to the county level the way liquor is regulated.

The only Bill I would ever endorse would the one that dissolves our current government in favor of one run by us.

Besides, if your not cool enough to find dope, you probably shouldn't be doing it in the first place.

[poolhall_junkie]

"Besides, if your not cool enough to find dope, you probably shouldn't be doing it in the first place." no if you cant find weed then you're no longer in the 7th grade and you stopped looking for it and went on to the harder stuff. and note i put a provisionary period on the narcotics period because you no somebody is gonna ruin it for all the druggies.

[Aaron Burr]

Wait...what were we talking about?

[poolhall_junkie]

the whole point of the idea of the bill is slide of hand
one hand is in a flashy way is distracting everyone with legalizing pot
while the other hand descretely shoves deport all illegals in behind it

[Aaron Burr]

Duuuuuuuude. You're so wasted.

Or you have a wicked brilliant scheme. I'll let you know after I hit the fridge. I have the munchies for some reason.

I guess I'm just not into giving the hippies anything. The bill should be named the "Get the Hell out of my Country Pronto." H.R. 666.

But again, in the spirit of compromise I'm willing to make it legal for all the illegals to take a stoner back to their country and give them slave wage labor jobs.

I have no idea how legal dope is south of the border. Probably not much.

Seems like a win win all the way around.

[Spirit of Ronald Reagan]

This idea's better used as a smoke screen for survival of the fittest, with a side of amusement. What better way to eliminate hippy, liberal douchebags from voting by making it easier and legal for them to be stoned all the time so we could vote to eliminate their kind and all the other tree hugged fairies along with them. Plus, then the ole twinkie on a string gag would come back into style.

[Aaron Burr]

O.K. I get it already. My point is that we can't accede to every kooky demand the losers whine and moan for. It's bad for business.

However, since so many seem to think legal weed is inevitable (because they are susceptible to propaganda) I've decided to join forces and reverse Reagan's sound and wise philosophy.

How about if we make everything legal. And we drop all safety requirements for just about everything. That way, only weak and whiny losers that willingly place themselves under the yoke of oppressive tyranny will interact with FedGov.

If you smoke dope, then you pay taxes. In fact, if you do anything that ends up costing FedGov any money, you pay taxes. The rest of us go on and live our lives without interference and nannying from the Feds.

Legalizing weed simply means more government regulation and oversight.

Sigh.

F*ck it. I'm building a still.

And I'm reporting everyone on this site (starting with myself) to the White House.

Again.